tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-50804122336697321022024-02-06T23:35:05.306-06:00Rindas2momHearts Held Hostage.....
The Effects Of
Parental AlienationRindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.comBlogger47125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-42021860662594437052010-08-22T22:21:00.006-05:002010-08-22T23:01:37.966-05:00Summer's Last Hours<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXQlPtdl0YHtMRqGFcakRlXDt5kKUhXLMfihmzPqgH_0_g5psExuvpffM5C3AI7EFu2y0-896ZvDL9ZNdfyclMiflNyTWTnnlVwO6Hnvz7OOiHyDKEijroSmZkupEEuD-_ZE1mE15u7gg/s1600/DSCF4391.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXQlPtdl0YHtMRqGFcakRlXDt5kKUhXLMfihmzPqgH_0_g5psExuvpffM5C3AI7EFu2y0-896ZvDL9ZNdfyclMiflNyTWTnnlVwO6Hnvz7OOiHyDKEijroSmZkupEEuD-_ZE1mE15u7gg/s400/DSCF4391.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5508448826960598210" /></a><br />These are your last hours "Ole Summer of 2010"....It's been amazing and it's been awful, right, Rinda ? Tomorrow marks Day 75 since your 18th birthday. Today marks two long months since your boyfriend, S. left for the military. I know that must be hard for you. You've been separated from your loved ones far too much already in your short life, my heart breaks for you, having to miss someone every minute of every day. It is emotionally exhausting. I hope you are doing well and feeling strong. Today marks the last day before school starts. I don't know your plans as far as if you are going to return to school or not. I don't know if you are going to work full time or get a GED certificate instead. Whatever you do I hope you are doing what is right for you instead of what others want you to do. Only you know your true heart. However, I do know that your BFF since 3rd grade V. has moved away to college as have a number of your other very good friends and fellow classmates. The Seniors of 2010 are on the move now. Tonight V. is preparing for her first day of college in just a matter of hours. I'm sure you are happy for her as I am, but it is bittersweet to think of how wrong plans can go. Ten years ago we imagined you and her as college room-mates. Oh, my sweet Rinda, whatever road you are on, I wish you well. Even if your journey is not taking you to where we imagined back when you were little, as long as you are safe, healthy and happy, then it is easier to live with the fact that we do not exist in your world. Hope you are enjoying the last hours of the last summer of your childhood. Because tomorrow school starts and college starts and it's now time to go to live in the real world. It was a beautiful sunset this evening Rinda and I thought of you !!!!<strong></strong><strong></strong><strong></strong>Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-66291563566757674532010-07-29T00:01:00.000-05:002010-07-29T00:01:00.760-05:00Rinda....Our Warrior Princess<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieB1-QOPXcJzXRjos8JAzLMhD9fv5MX8tv5xHF96dlGz3fNW582recOhHqSoneeI06FquQLeUUJqnJyP29esEPEmrV3a4hNvuB15pa5PKUcD6JW3JZkfcIY1YIJLPDV3_kF1XefoFsmwA/s1600/scan0036.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 370px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieB1-QOPXcJzXRjos8JAzLMhD9fv5MX8tv5xHF96dlGz3fNW582recOhHqSoneeI06FquQLeUUJqnJyP29esEPEmrV3a4hNvuB15pa5PKUcD6JW3JZkfcIY1YIJLPDV3_kF1XefoFsmwA/s400/scan0036.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499052401066692754" /></a><br /><br />Rinda, this is you....our warrior princess. The foto was taken during the summer of 2000. I edited it today....That's what I did today instead of texting you or emailing you today on the 50th day since your 18th birthday, Fifty days since you became an adult and actually do have the right to choose to not allow us to be a part of your world.....Fifty days doesn't sound like much to you, I know, but it is an eternity to us....counting the 3302 days of your childhood was stolen from us and from you. That adds up to 3352 days since you walked through the door of our home. And that my dear is a damn long time. That is half of your lifetime and one fifth of mine. <br /><br />The original version of this foto is one of my all-time favorite photos of you. The jungle print cloth which Grandma Betty made your outfit from is perfect for this foto with it's many bright colors. One of the things I love about this foto is that you came up with the idea all on your own...you put the feathers in your hair and you made your spear all on your own with a quartz crystal rock that we got in Arkansas when we went camping on an island (remember we took our baby goat camping with us ?) One of the things I like about this foto is that you had to work sooo hard to look mean,fierce and angry like a warrior for this foto. In reality you were the sweetest,kindest,happiest, funniest eight year old girl on the planet. Being a warrior wasn't something in your future until your childhood got hijacked by parental alienation.<br /><br />Over the past four years I've seen that you have "waged war" on many fronts. Now you are at war with yourself and many others. You've gone from being bullied to bullying others. Do the words "terroristic threatening" remind you of the hassles you've been involved in over the past few years. You were threatened so now you've learned to threaten others. I know your heart and you defend yourself sometimes to the extreme.I've seen you become an angry young woman who ends up in a hassle with different people in different places. Are you out looking for a fight? I've seen time after time you being involved in some fight or kind of an angry argument with other people including people your own age within your social circle. You've learned to defy other's authority to a point we worry about your safety. If I were given only five minutes to see you face to face, I would ask you "what will it take for you to be able to stop being a warrior and learn to live in peace with yourself, your friends and family as well as society in general???? " All the professionals haven't been able to answer this question "Why is Rinda so angry".....but I know the answer. I've always known the answer.....but my love you are going to have to ask yourself that question and answer it for yourself honestly before you will be able to overcome the issues that will continue to cause you problems in your future because those issues will affect you and the people you choose to share your life with. No matter what, we love you.....our little warrior princess !!!!Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-45090253690169259922010-07-28T23:59:00.000-05:002010-07-29T00:28:11.756-05:00Alice Cooper Live 1971 - "I'm Eighteen"For you Rinda.......<br /><br /><object style="background-image:url(http://i2.ytimg.com/vi/5oFsvQ8FyBU/hqdefault.jpg)" width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/5oFsvQ8FyBU&hl=en_US&fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/5oFsvQ8FyBU&hl=en_US&fs=1" width="425" height="344" allowScriptAccess="never" allowFullScreen="true" wmode="transparent" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"></embed></object>Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-76139961446981554122010-07-28T23:30:00.000-05:002010-07-29T00:56:23.692-05:00Rindas2mom: Re-establishing RelationshipsThis is from the Joshua Rose Foundation....hope it is helpful<br /><br /><a href="http://joshuarosefoundation.blogspot.com/2010/04/re-establishing-relationships.html">Rindas2mom: Re-establishing Relationships</a>Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-83376402666434970742010-07-27T10:24:00.003-05:002010-07-27T10:30:29.130-05:00Words of Wisdom....Good Morning Rinda !!!!<br /><br /> I wanted to share these words of wisdom with you. This quote came from someone that you used to love, trust and respect back when you used to love, trust and respect your Dad and I. I know my words no longer have any meaning to you, so I'm using this quote from an old friend of yours. <br /><br /><br />"If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together.. there is something you must always remember. you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. but the most important thing is, even if we're apart.. I'll always be with you."<br /><br />- Winnie the PoohRindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-45156333111584772282010-07-22T19:56:00.004-05:002010-07-22T23:33:57.317-05:00Promises....Promises are easier made than they are kept. The bigger the promise, the harder it is to keep. Rinda, it has been 43 days since your 18th birthday and I have refrained from calling you, emailing you, texting you or sending you s card in the mail. It hasn't been easy either. I remind myself by re-reading the letter I wrote to you on your 18th birthday. I remind myself that you are a grown woman now and have the right to make your own decisions. I pray that they will be good ones.<br /><br />Rinda, thinking back, I remember, how important promises always were to you. Within 3 months of starting to date your Dad, we were in the Drive Thru at McDonalds on B. Mound Rd and you suddenly became very serious and wanted your Dad and I to promise you that we would never break up. He stopped what he was doing and turned around to you and said he promised you that we would not break up. As soon as he did, you turned to me and I paused and started to tell you about how in life things happen that we can't predict to cause things to happen that we can't anticipate, but instead I looked you square in the eye and said that I too promised. I took that promise very seriously. And due to the things that we couldn't predict to happen, you were stolen from your Dad and I and have been alienated from us. That has put enormous stress on the relationship between your Dad and I but we have never broken up. We made that promise to you on Dec.2, 1999, back when you were seven years old and we have kept that promise for almost eleven years. Back then,you told me that you wished that your Dad & I would be like Billy & Motsey but I didn't know what you meant by that. You said that it meant "To stay together forever and to always stay happy". I told you that was exactly what we intended to do stay together....forever....stay....happy !!!!!<br /><br />As of today, it has been 43 days since your 18th birthday. So, how are you liking being legally an adult? I also, know that as of today your boyfriend S has been gone for a month. I'm sure that there were many promises made between the two of you before he left to join the military. I'm sure the two of you have big plans for the future and if that is the best thing for you and your life, then, I wish you all the best. After all, you being happy and healthy, has always been what is most important to us. I'm surprised that given your family history that you DO believe in the whole "marriage and happily ever after" thing. I am glad to see that despite all that.... "hope" does live in your heart. Like I said earlier, promises are easier to make than they are to keep. The bigger the promise the harder it s to keep. And in general, the younger you are, the harder it is to keep the the promises made, especially in romantic relationships. It's a big ole world out there Rinda and you are just now at the beginning of that Yellow Brick Road. Please make sure that you know where you are going so that when you get there that it will be the right place for you. <br /><br />Some promises made are actually better left unkept. In particular those promises are typically made due to poor judgement, based on less than accurate information or made out of anger or grief. All the times that you promised to never contact with us is a promise that should not be kept. Please don't stay away because you are too proud to contact us because in the past you emphatically stated that you have no space in your world for us. Try not to burn the bridges to your past for you may want to cross over them again someday ! But where ever you go and whatever you do there is one thing that remains constant and that is the unconditional love which your Dad and I have for you !!!!Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-30020388498168529962010-07-13T11:15:00.001-05:002010-07-13T11:16:47.765-05:00My WishRinda.....this is the song that your dad dedicated to you. This is what we wish for you. Your Dad bought you this CD for you for Christmas in 2007. Remember ????<br /><br /><br /><object style="background-image:url(http://i1.ytimg.com/vi/xz32I_GbpeU/hqdefault.jpg)" width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/xz32I_GbpeU&hl=en_US&fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/xz32I_GbpeU&hl=en_US&fs=1" width="425" height="344" allowScriptAccess="never" allowFullScreen="true" wmode="transparent" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"></embed></object>Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-72264326826739803982010-06-20T10:19:00.005-05:002010-07-10T22:28:05.573-05:00It's Father's Day Again.....It's Father's Day again. It is the 10th Father's Day since Rinda was "stolen" from her Dad and I. A year ago, we still had the hope that the legal system would help reunite our family. It didn't happen. The legal system never did help nor will it ever help our family overcome the damaging effects of Parental Alienation. The Family Court System did however enable the situation which harmed our family. Although it didn't cause it, it did allow it and enable it. <br /><br />Every year I wonder how you feel on Father's Day Rinda ???? Everywhere you turn on that day you hear the word FATHER, you hear people saying my dad this, my dad that, everyone saying Happy Father's Day to their dads. What goes through your mind on Father's Day? It is sad to see a daughter live as though she is fatherless when she has a dedicated father. The only thing your dad is guilty of is of giving in to you and your mother to try to keep the peace for your sake. That is the only thing !!!! Happy Father's Day Rinda !!!!Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-11488288149265778742010-06-15T23:00:00.004-05:002010-06-15T23:40:36.323-05:00What Gives Me Hope ????WHAT GIVES ME HOPE ???? *asks a Parental Alienation Facebook friend*<br /><br />Rinda, the following words are which I chose to use to answer that question.<br /><br />"The Great Creator gives me hope, every single day. And certain facts give me hope, such as, the fact that when you were little girl, Rinda, you knew without a doubt that your Dad and I loved you unconditionally. You knew, that even though your mother spoke badly of us that we continually refused to EVER speak against her. You knew that we honored her just because she was your mother and the fact that she always would be your mother. The fact that we NEVER did a single thing to cause or to deserve to lose the love, trust and respect of our precious <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">little</span> 9 year old daughter. It gives me hope that you turned 18 years old last week and that eventually you will become an emotionally mature young woman which lives in the real world and will no long be in an <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">environment</span> in which you are being used as a weapon against your Dad & I. The fact that I know your heart and I know that somewhere deep inside you are still the same person that we know and love. It gives me hope knowing that the experts say that 95% of of alienated children will eventually reconcile with their Target Parent, despite of the Alienating Parent's disapproval. It gives me hope that the experts say that the NUMBER ONE factor in being reunited again depends on the quality of the relationship BEFORE the effects of Parental Alienation destroyed the bond. Also, the fact that I choose hope over hopelessness everyday, over and over every single day."<br /><br />I added this message to that Parental Alienation <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">Facebook</span> friend:<br /><br />That if I was able to give you even just a small amount of hope by saying all of this then that goes to prove that hope can come from the most <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">unexpected</span> sources. Best wishes to you & yours.<br /><br />(By the way, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-error">Rinda</span>....Glad you made it back from Mexico, safe and sound. There's proof of another answered prayer. Glad you had a wonderful vacation !!!! )Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-58308631139247856092010-06-12T23:38:00.003-05:002010-06-12T23:56:41.359-05:00Good Advice Deserves Repeating<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh60q4h6uNN67gchy7U81950q_pwj4RKgcjiQOfPcalJtJ57Bq7Gy8sHjU0WT9DMsNCYbGhee9BWT17C6tlMchraQNDydvWUIaqTC9eXCYw_TX9yHO92WtSXLPgg9XCLiVqXtlfQ0CyDtY/s1600/DSCF0184%5B1%5D.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 300px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5482117247660074530" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh60q4h6uNN67gchy7U81950q_pwj4RKgcjiQOfPcalJtJ57Bq7Gy8sHjU0WT9DMsNCYbGhee9BWT17C6tlMchraQNDydvWUIaqTC9eXCYw_TX9yHO92WtSXLPgg9XCLiVqXtlfQ0CyDtY/s400/DSCF0184%5B1%5D.jpg" /></a><br /><div>Rinda, this is what I wrote for your 16th Birthday. Good advice deserves repeating !<br /><br />Monday June 9, 2008<br />Today is my stepdaughter's sixteenth birthday. My precious little girl is no longer so little.Today she is only two short years from becoming a legal adult. I'm writing this blog to preserve it as a somewhat permanent record of this special day. The birthday card may be forgotten, lost or thrown away, so I wanted to put it on my blog to record it for the future. I am going to include the wording on the birthday card as well as the note that I included in her card.<br />This is the birthday card that I chose for her 16th birthday:<br /><br />HOW TO MAKE A BEAUTIFUL LIFE<br />"Reflections For A Daughter On Her Birthday"<br /><br />LOVE YOURSELF.<br />MAKE PEACE WITH WHO YOU ARE<br />AND WHERE YOU ARE<br />AT THIS MOMENT IN TIME.<br />LISTEN TO YOUR HEART.<br />IF YOU CAN'T HEAR WHAT IT'S SAYING<br />IN THIS NOISY WORLD,<br />MAKE TIME FOR YOURSELF.<br />ENJOY YOUR OWN COMPANY.<br />LET YOUR MIND WANDER AMONG THE STARS.<br />TRY.<br />TAKE CHANCES.<br />MAKE MISTAKES.<br />LIFE CAN BE MESSY<br />AND CONFUSING AT TIMES,<br />BUT IT'S ALSO FULL OF SURPRISES.<br />THE NEXT ROCK IN YOUR PATH<br />MIGHT BE A STEPPING STONE.<br />BE HAPPY,<br />WHEN YOU DON'T HAVE WHAT YOU WANT,<br />WANT WHAT YOU HAVE.<br />MAKE DO.<br />THAT'S A WELL-KEPT SECRET OF CONTENTMENT.<br />THERE AREN'T ANY SHORTCUTS TO TOMORROW.<br />YOU HAVE TO MAKE YOUR OWN WAY.<br />TO KNOW WHERE YOU'RE GOING<br />IS ONLY PART OF IT.<br />YOU NEED TO KNOW WHERE YOU'VE BEEN, TOO.<br />AND IF YOU EVER GET LOST, DON'T WORRY,<br />THE PEOPLE WHO LOVE YOU WILL FIND YOU.<br />COUNT ON IT.<br />LIFE ISN'T DAYS AND YEARS.<br />IT'S WHAT YOU DO WITH TIME<br />AND WITH ALL THE GOODNESS AND GRACE<br />THAT'S INSIDE YOU.<br />MAKE A BEAUTIFUL LIFE....<br />THE KIND OF LIFE YOU DESERVE !<br /><br />Here is my note to her.<br /><br />Monday June 9, 2008<br />D.<br />On your 16th birthday I wish you all the best that the world has to offer. You've been through some hard times and there will be more ahead but it will make you a much stronger woman in the long run. Stay true to yourself, learn from mistakes, yours as well as those of others, be independent, study yourself to find your true purpose, enjoy simple pleasures, open your heart to those who honor and respect you, forgive those who don't. Don't let anyone tell you who you are - you SHOW THEM who you are by the way that you live your life. Over the years, you will change in ways that you'll never expect and the world will change in ways that no one will ever be able to anticipate. Change is the only factor in life that is guaranteed. Don't burn your bridges to your past, for the day may come that you'll want or need to cross back over them. No matter where you go or what you do, or what you become - my love, support and understanding are yours for as long as I live - 24 / 7 / 365. Remember I carry you always in my heart. With all my love, always.... <strong></strong></div>Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-3405276088853508802010-06-10T09:47:00.004-05:002010-06-10T22:28:03.697-05:00Have A Great Trip RindaOn the ferry crossing from<br />Cozumel to Playa del Carmen,<br />Quintana Roo, Mexico 1988<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEii4TIf3VYDhdQpu-PPJoa1ro-8QMcMxjHnvpkDY25ZyF-ff2O_cGi6z_XKAqRXnBuXgYsXfW98yZlUPrYntOuF5gDixvMlPgp5zk1P1H8WYYY0JvNseDfNaccW6In4_-RUfQYxrp17cHQ/s1600/scan0027.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 280px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5481351438623282130" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEii4TIf3VYDhdQpu-PPJoa1ro-8QMcMxjHnvpkDY25ZyF-ff2O_cGi6z_XKAqRXnBuXgYsXfW98yZlUPrYntOuF5gDixvMlPgp5zk1P1H8WYYY0JvNseDfNaccW6In4_-RUfQYxrp17cHQ/s400/scan0027.jpg" /></a><br /><div>Have a great trip <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Rinda</span>. I know that you and your boyfriend, S. are flying to Mexico today for vacation. Be careful and have fun and please do make good choices. Remember you can do something in an instant that will cause you a lifetime of regret. I also know that this is your second trip to Mexico (you went to your sister's wedding in 2007).<br /><br /><br /><br />Remember when you were a little girl and we would sit and look at my photo albums of my many trips to Mexico ? You loved listening to the stories of my adventures. You would say "please, just tell me one more story about Mexico". We talked so much about our plans to go to Mexico as a family, you, your Dad and I. Well, instead it looks like you are exploring Mexico on your own now (you & S).<br /><br />When you see the ferry that goes from <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">Playa</span> <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">del</span> Carmen to Cozumel, that is where your Grandpa Big John and I took those photos during our trip in 1988. Hey, maybe that monkey that you liked the picture of so much will be there to greet you when you arrive. Tell him hello for me. I'm sure you and S. with have the time of your lives. Enjoy yourselves !!!!<br /><br />But remember Dorothy you are not in Kansas anymore.....</div>Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-88261097123242052192010-06-08T22:34:00.002-05:002010-06-08T22:40:37.450-05:00Cat Stevens - Wild World with lyrics<p><object style="BACKGROUND-IMAGE: url(http://i1.ytimg.com/vi/HJRkrJx2ekA/hqdefault.jpg)" width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/HJRkrJx2ekA&hl=en_US&fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/HJRkrJx2ekA&hl=en_US&fs=1" width="425" height="344" allowscriptaccess="never" allowfullscreen="true" wmode="transparent" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"></embed></object></p><p>I dedicate this song to Rinda on the eve of her 18th birthday.....</p><p>It's a wild world and it's hard to get by on a smile !!!!!</p>Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-37316584029529553382010-06-08T19:33:00.007-05:002010-06-08T22:33:03.160-05:00SHS Class of 2010Tonight is your graduation night. As we speak, you, the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">SHS</span> Class of 2010 are dressed in caps and gowns ready to walk across the stage to receive your diplomas. <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">Rinda's</span> best friend since 3rd grade will be one of those students. V. has had an amazing high school experience. In her academic endeavors as well as her extra curricular activities she has excelled. We are so happy for her today because not only is it her graduation day is also her 18<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">th</span> birthday. A day that I'm sure that she will never forget. Congratulations V. We love you and wish you all the best always.<br /><br />We had big plans and big dreams about this day as well. I had <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">planned</span> to be present as <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">SHS</span> Class of 2010 walked across the stage. But that was back before <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">Rinda</span> became ineligible to graduate due to lack of credits due to truancy due to parental alienation.<br /><br />Although she is not on that stage, I am certain that she is there as a spectator since all of her friends are receiving their diplomas. I wish that I could be there as a spectator as well. For years we talked about being there as she graduated, but as our hopes and dreams were destroyed by parental alienationright along with <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-error">Rinda's</span> ability to see us as a part of her family. This is the last night that Rinda will ever be a 17 year old. Tonight is one of the most important nights of her life and I wish her all the happiness in the world. Tomorrow when she wakes up, she will legally be an adult and not "our" little girl anymore, although in our hearts she will always remain. She will finally be free from her Dad and I as she has wished for soooo long. All there is left to say is: Please Lord, hold her hand and guide her life in a positive direction.<br /><br />May Rinda and her friends have the time of their lives. Hey, SHS Class of 2010............... the future belongs to you !!!!Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-33252112724460558362010-06-04T10:41:00.003-05:002010-06-04T10:51:18.043-05:00Today Is....Today is different than all the other days before today<br /><br />Today is the first day that Rinda MIGHT actually see this blog<br /><br />Today is the day that she receives her birthday card in which I included the link to this blog<br /><br />Today I will go from writing this blog about her -TO- writing this blog to her<br /><br />Today there are only 4 days, 13 hours & 42 minutes left until her 18th birthday. When I first posted the countdown clock on my MySpace profile it had almost 4 years to count down. It's been a long hard four years. Actually it's been a horrendously painful 9 yrs since Rinda was "stolen" from her Dad and I....some things do not get better with time<br />:-( :-( :-( :-(Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-90037284910837258852010-06-02T21:04:00.007-05:002010-06-03T02:16:04.153-05:00My LAST letter 2 Rinda B4 Her Childhood Ends...June 9, 2010<br /><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error"><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Rinda</span></span>....Happy Birthday to My <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error"><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">Chula</span></span> on your 18<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error"><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">th</span></span> birthday. On June 9, 2010, YOU will be legally an adult and you WILL be able to make your own decisions... NOW you really do have the right to choose.... I am "LETTING GO" but I am not "GIVING UP", I never give up on the people I love. My birthday gift to you is freedom. You are now officially FREE to live your life as you please !!!!!<br /><br />If you think I have forgotten...I have not. If you think I have given up....I never will. You are a grown woman now, although NONE of these family problems/issues are your fault, Because they never have been your fault. I have NEVER blamed you for anything. But now YOU are the person that will be held accountable for every moment of every day from now on. At the stroke of midnight on the eve of your birthday, you DO inherit everything that has happened....it becomes YOUR legacy of pain....YOU own it....it is NOW yours....it belongs to YOU. It is not what I would have chose for you but I had no choice in the matter. I fought for the past 9 years to save you and your childhood from the damage that parental alienation causes.<br /><br />I know that it is too painful for you to search for the truth right now, but YOU will never have any peace until you find all of the missing pieces. I have kept all the proof, whenever you are strong enough and brave enough to look at the situation with an open mind....let me know. I will give you every detail that I have saved for you. If you do not choose to be a member of this family before the day of my death, I will leave instructions with someone else to hold on to all of the evidence of the facts for you in case someday you do want to know the truth of WHY & HOW your childhood was hijacked. If you wait too long you will miss the opportunity, but as long as your Dad & I are still living....it will never be too late.<br /><br />Our door will always be open to you....our arms will always be reaching out to you and in our hearts you will forever remain. FOREVER NO MATTER WHAT !!!!<br /><br />Please learn how to forgive, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error"><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">Rinda</span></span>. It is the key to a happy life. Without learning to forgive you will continue to scar your own heart, which in the long run will hurt YOU much more than it will hurt the people that you refuse to forgive.<br /><br />Remember there is NOTHING that you can do to stop us from loving YOU.... Love is a choice and you chose to love me way back then, when you were 7 years old. I chose to accept that love and love you back. For me that will never change. It is all in YOUR hands now. You told me in 2008, that YOU will come back to me. You said that you will give me that chance to re-earn your LOVE, TRUST and RESPECT..... I will wait for that day to arrive.....someday.<br /><br />Please know that you remain forever in my heart. Good Luck <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error"><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">Rinda</span></span>.....NOW..... go conquer the world and have an amazing life ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-90678072991325399932010-06-02T09:51:00.003-05:002010-06-02T11:56:08.012-05:00E I G H T E E N<span style="color:#ff0000;"><strong>E</strong> - enthusiasm: </span><span style="color:#000000;">for life and everything that it holds in store for your future. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">esteem: </span><span style="color:#000000;">to know how valuable you are & to be able to regard other with respect. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">eccentricity: </span><span style="color:#000000;">to have the courage to be different when the world tells you that you must follow the path that is considered to be the norm. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">enlightenment: </span><span style="color:#000000;">to give you a wide variety of knowledge, contentment & spiritual guidance.</span><br /><br /><span style="color:#ff0000;"><strong>I </strong>- intuition: </span><span style="color:#000000;">to know what is right for yourself & others. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">idealism: </span><span style="color:#000000;">so that you can set goals & strive toward them.</span><span style="color:#ff0000;"> identity: </span><span style="color:#000000;">I hope you find your early. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">imagination: </span><span style="color:#000000;">so that your thoughts will be original & really yours.</span><br />to<br /><span style="color:#ff0000;"><strong>G </strong>- gratitude: </span><span style="color:#000000;">to always be thankful & really know how to appreciate life's many blessings, which often are concealed in a disguise of tribulation. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">giddiness: </span><span style="color:#000000;">to be able to be silly when the situation calls for it. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">genuineness: </span><span style="color:#000000;">to be real in a world that reward imitations. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">grit:</span><span style="color:#000000;"> to be tough enough to take care of yourself others in a dangerous world. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">gentleness: </span><span style="color:#000000;">to be able to enjoy the kind, sweet moments in life without fear of being regarded as weak.</span><br /><br /><span style="color:#ff0000;"><strong>H </strong>- happiness: </span><span style="color:#000000;">the real kind, that dwells in your mind, body & soul. The kind that no one can take away from you, the kind that you will be able to share with others. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">health:</span><span style="color:#000000;"> to be able to live a long life with good physical health, mental health & emotional health. Your health will determine your ability to enjoy all the other aspects of life. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">hardiness: </span><span style="color:#000000;">to be able to survive & even thrive under potentially unfavorable conditions. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">harmony: </span><span style="color:#000000;">to be able to live in peace with yourself as well as others.</span><br /><br /><span style="color:#ff0000;"><strong>T </strong>- time: </span><span style="color:#000000;">to grow & learn while you still have the shelter of your home & your family. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">tenderness: </span><span style="color:#000000;">so that you can be soft & loving without embarrassment. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">tolerance: </span><span style="color:#000000;">for this world & the people in it that you really don't understand. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">thankfulness: </span><span style="color:#000000;">for all that you have & all that you receive, even for the world around you.</span><br /><br /><span style="color:#ff0000;"><strong>E </strong>- existence: </span><span style="color:#000000;">which your parents gave you 18 years ago. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">experience: </span><span style="color:#000000;">this we must let you earn for yourself although we will gladly share with you what we've earned. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">eagerness: </span><span style="color:#000000;">with which to meet this new world which you are entering as an adult.</span><br /><br /><span style="color:#ff0000;"><strong>E </strong>- empathy: </span><span style="color:#000000;">so that you can put yourself in the other person's shoes & understand what they are feeling. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">emotion: </span><span style="color:#000000;">don't be afraid of your emotions, but do learn to control them. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">equality: </span><span style="color:#000000;">so that you may never be discriminated against.</span><br /><br /><span style="color:#ff0000;"><strong>N </strong>- nerve: </span><span style="color:#000000;">of the good old bull-dog variety, so that you will never be afraid of life & of standing up for what you believe in. </span><span style="color:#ff0000;">nonchalance: </span><span style="color:#000000;">so that no one will be able to see how scared you are at times, as you go out into this big ole world.</span><br /><br /><strong><span style="color:#ff0000;">THESE ARE JUST A FEW OF THE GOOD THINGS I WISH FOR YOU NOW ON YOUR 18TH BIRTHDAY AND ALWAYS. MAY ALL OF YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE.</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#ff0000;">WITH ALL MY LOVE, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">eoo</span></span></strong>Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-2444213928646536342010-06-01T22:39:00.004-05:002010-06-10T22:29:55.597-05:007 days 1 hour and 19 minutes left...There are 7 days 1 hour and 19 minutes until Rinda's 18th Birthday. I've refrained from posting on my blog for a long time because I didn't want to undermine any possible positive develops from our long legal batttle. It has been so long since I've updated that most of you have probably forgotten about Rinda's situation. Here is where we stand: The social study stated that Rinda has been parentally alienated but that it is too late to do anything about it. The judge ordered that Rinda and her Dad attend counseling. It's been months of delays and cancellation plus some rescheduled appointments. Rinda finally did attend two sessions. She arrived at the 2nd session on May 12, 2010 to inform the counselor & Rinda's Dad that she would no longer be attending because it was a waste of her time and since her 18th birthday is approaching no one can make her attend. Our attorney has been telling us for months NOT to stress out over her 18th birthday, since she will NOT be graduating (due to excessive unexcused absences, due to the effects of parental alienation) and we are required to continue to pay child support, her medical and dental insurance that she will STILL be under the jurisdiction of the court and will be required to continue counseling. Rinda was shocked as she stated that it is her belief that her Dad has NEVER paid child support. He has been paying child support for almost 14 years now and she has been convinced that he is a deadbeat dad.Well, a few days ago, we received the bad news that Rinda will be free of us on June 9th. She will NOT be required to go to counseling. We were heart broken AGAIN. We will be required to continue to be financially responsible for her until she graduates which at this point is scheduled for 2012 when she is 20 yrs old. This year is her 4th year of high school. She has spent 3 years in 9th grade and 1 year in 10th grade. By the status of her grades & unexcused absences she will not make it to 11th grade this year either as her mother laughs all the way to the bank. What has occurred is immoral and it should be considered criminal to hijack a little girl's childhood when her only crime was to have the father that her mother chose for her.Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-22965845239200658412010-05-31T12:17:00.000-05:002010-06-06T23:24:52.453-05:00Rinda's Things From Grandmaw BettyThe little straw hat that Grandmaw Betty gave Rinda is STILL hanging on the hat rack !<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivtMjvROhc7FHiiP_g8acqonPooP8g_l4_ljTvywM7GmpxI0YzwI9EHyiEKzbjSS6oFslpBtFS5lB3yyOpxXX450qcMPXn99BoqKVmQ8P2KYxJSEDG1uB4XMXBHqs8P9SUvO2lNp_OiGM/s1600/DSCF1162.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 300px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5478970843337881458" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivtMjvROhc7FHiiP_g8acqonPooP8g_l4_ljTvywM7GmpxI0YzwI9EHyiEKzbjSS6oFslpBtFS5lB3yyOpxXX450qcMPXn99BoqKVmQ8P2KYxJSEDG1uB4XMXBHqs8P9SUvO2lNp_OiGM/s400/DSCF1162.JPG" /></a> These are just a few of the many things that Grandmaw Betty made for Rinda when she was a little girl. Rinda and her Grandmaw Betty were very close, they were "thicker than thieves" Rinda's clothes are still hanging in the closet....awaiting her return. It's been 9 long years, but we continue to hope that someday these items will become important to Rinda someday.....so we are saving them for her......for someday !!!!<br /><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxShaBjuzsfjGeBuxPUL_X0jh_ESajM8D0FqyHFOSOZVlX-cEfrVhW3AFVWSVckE8NAWXl1Nm9ixJiVcBHYSx996CXSdBRK6nbcpZWXR7oCI35wr5FYoqFdFY09TsjHg67vYiZKh8kcHY/s1600/DSCF1164.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 300px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5478969854842839410" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxShaBjuzsfjGeBuxPUL_X0jh_ESajM8D0FqyHFOSOZVlX-cEfrVhW3AFVWSVckE8NAWXl1Nm9ixJiVcBHYSx996CXSdBRK6nbcpZWXR7oCI35wr5FYoqFdFY09TsjHg67vYiZKh8kcHY/s400/DSCF1164.JPG" /></a><br /><br /><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUn0uhFdzKBtgRzpLk_jffIRZRh47PwPUPqMyygS8-rUXWD28FBTjFNKdurASzn_wynwoAS2z5koem9KF3Ha_9fk7P3M715H6XSrmMjbC5oQL4Wgi6dxDAigcA79B9GAc40OvA_p15Fyw/s1600/DSCF1165.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 300px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5478969842559405762" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUn0uhFdzKBtgRzpLk_jffIRZRh47PwPUPqMyygS8-rUXWD28FBTjFNKdurASzn_wynwoAS2z5koem9KF3Ha_9fk7P3M715H6XSrmMjbC5oQL4Wgi6dxDAigcA79B9GAc40OvA_p15Fyw/s400/DSCF1165.JPG" /></a><br /><br /><br /><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQfBTWTQVlNLdD7_YUN3stzvBKxhZmUFSsn13bi623Qw0OHETmo7l4yiA20154C20l8-pj8yavjzLH1Aw_R6egPflOaaXIiJ1RSP1RA8DG1evgCn7k3Q_UWoawBsJmSHAiognf-C15z2s/s1600/DSCF1163.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 300px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5478969834861308594" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQfBTWTQVlNLdD7_YUN3stzvBKxhZmUFSsn13bi623Qw0OHETmo7l4yiA20154C20l8-pj8yavjzLH1Aw_R6egPflOaaXIiJ1RSP1RA8DG1evgCn7k3Q_UWoawBsJmSHAiognf-C15z2s/s400/DSCF1163.JPG" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><div></div></div></div></div>Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-53240876511226580102010-03-02T13:09:00.003-06:002010-03-02T13:23:05.761-06:00Words of a daughter to her Dad....These words were a gift to <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Rinda's</span> Dad from his grown daughter, on the day of his retirement after 28+ years of his career. She gave him a framed photo of them together with this poem placed below it. It was a beautiful act of love and kindness. May his younger daughter, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">Rinda</span>, someday read these words and know who her father really is, as her father, as a man of integrity and as a dedicated fire fighter......<br /><br /><strong><span style="color:#993399;">I LOVE MY FATHER AND AM SO PROUD OF HIM,</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#993399;">NOT ONLY IS HE MY DAD, BUT HE'S A FIREMAN.</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#993399;"></span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#993399;">HE LOVINGLY AND GRACIOUSLY SACRIFICED HIS LIFE FOR ME.</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#993399;">HE DID THIS WHILE PROTECTING & CARING FOR OTHERS SO UNSELFISHLY.</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#993399;"></span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#993399;">THROUGH HIS COURAGE, I HAVE FACED MY OWN FEARS.</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#993399;">HIS COMPASSION HAS ENCOURAGED ME THROUGHOUT THE YEARS.</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#993399;"></span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#993399;">MY FATHER'S STRENGTH WAS EVIDENT BECAUSE HE GAVE HIS ALL.</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#993399;">NOW HE CAN REST AND REFLECT SINCE HE HAS ANSWERED HIS LAST CALL.</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#993399;"></span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#993399;">HIS FAITH, DETERMINATION AND COURAGE WILL NEVER BE LAID TO REST.</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#993399;">AS MY FATHER AND A FIREMAN, I CAN SAY HE IS THE BEST !</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#993399;"></span></strong>Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-42385908047135429872010-02-09T12:00:00.001-06:002010-02-10T13:50:29.243-06:00The Future Belongs To....<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-cYVAcH30OU_Ap7ej9LnHh-3BWObAxuHKLdTdAqdhK5JoxMEfsK6e2saYU4V9Y3_5srROuAFRTBoyoNIp0O3L3fmHAX4Enq69H1Nn14q6IvUf8AEEcR4gOyk2bgBX59NgMvEJ_NqidVM/s1600-h/DSCF0443%5B1%5D.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 300px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5436699825544105506" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-cYVAcH30OU_Ap7ej9LnHh-3BWObAxuHKLdTdAqdhK5JoxMEfsK6e2saYU4V9Y3_5srROuAFRTBoyoNIp0O3L3fmHAX4Enq69H1Nn14q6IvUf8AEEcR4gOyk2bgBX59NgMvEJ_NqidVM/s400/DSCF0443%5B1%5D.jpg" /></a><br /><div><span style="color:#ff0000;">THE FUTURE BELONGS TO THOSE WHO BELIEVE IN THE BEAUTY OF THEIR DREAMS....</span></div><div><span style="color:#ff0000;"></span> </div><div><span style="color:#000000;">As of today, February 9, 2010, there are only four months until Rinda's 18th birthday. Rinda's Dad and I still have not see Rinda and are STILL going through the legal process. As the wheels of justice grind ever so slowly.....we TRY to be patient and remain calm.</span></div><div><span style="color:#000000;"></span> </div><div><span style="color:#000000;"> While in the city for my interview with the social worker doing our social study I went to where Rinda works to deliver this flower arrangement along with a balloon that says "YOU ROCK". I intentionally went to her workplace at the time of day when she would not be on duty. It's VERY VERY difficult to be so close to where she is without being able to actually see her face, but showing up where she works uninvited and still very much unwelcome would obviously just make things worse. I had the florist take my photo while holding the flower arrangement, balloon and included it in the card that stated "The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams". I wanted Rinda to know that I'd delivered her flowers personally. I wrote on her card that I had only 6 months and 28 days to get used to the idea that she would be legally an adult and that she has a life of her own to lead and that I was practicing getting used to the idea. I wrote to her about how we are planning her 18th birthday party. I wrote to her about how much we love and miss her and how proud we are of her. I also wrote on her card that I chose this particular rose for her and that the red part signifies the love that we shared in the past and the yellow part signifies the friendship that I hope we will share in the future. Rinda's Dad received a text message from Rinda, telling him to tell me to stay away from her job. So, I just keep repeating to myself the message on the card.....</span><span style="color:#ff0000;">THE FUTURE BELONGS TO THOSE WHO BELIEVE IN THE BEAUTY OF THEIR DREAMS !!!!!!!!!</span></div>Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-68357318843193326702009-12-15T13:46:00.002-06:002009-12-15T13:54:58.045-06:00Rinda...back in the happy days !!!!<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dz_edratIQNJVpR1_-YKmokeqkgYqQxV-e_TGzmZYsIRjR_r8bfT-H9zrAP7ylH13QHoE3HGlPThxKyDS-v' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe>Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-65589262068734569162009-11-06T10:42:00.005-06:002009-11-06T11:52:23.642-06:00Falling Leaves Make Me Cry....<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjR_OB9u_ParTHpmavl1e0WetFhZdLlnfAnAk-5K210BOyC25VETNTxR0fY90AzQ0fX8wAJVIoDbcImYY9xM_gyyJt4xG3C2YRKnM84jfiLVGC0TZzgkbQxfAFsCjGx-45hJ6FB3gxVsEQ/s1600-h/DSCF0204%5B1%5D.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 300px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5401032227837180322" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjR_OB9u_ParTHpmavl1e0WetFhZdLlnfAnAk-5K210BOyC25VETNTxR0fY90AzQ0fX8wAJVIoDbcImYY9xM_gyyJt4xG3C2YRKnM84jfiLVGC0TZzgkbQxfAFsCjGx-45hJ6FB3gxVsEQ/s400/DSCF0204%5B1%5D.jpg" /></a><br /><div> Falling leaves make me cry... Let me explain to you why. In 2006,on this date November 6, I traveled to the city to have lunch with Rinda at her school. It was her freshman year in high school. Much to my surprise I WAS NOT allowed to see her. We'd gone to have lunch with her during elementary school and middle school. It was the only way we'd been able to see her since 4th grade, when Rinda's Mother began denying us visitation.</div><div> </div><div> </div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div> It had already been a difficult year for our family. In early 2006, Rinda's Grandma Esther (Rinda's Dad's mother) had died without being able to see her granddaughter's beautiful smile for the last several years of her life. Rinda was not allowed to even go to the funeral which was held there locally near Rinda's home. In the middle of 2006, Rinda's Dad's grown daughter's mother died suddenly without warning. It was a terrible tragedy, she was a kind and dedicated mother and loved by all members of both families.</div><div> </div><div> </div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div> When I took the road trip to have lunch with Rinda, I carried with me a handful of stuff to give her, letters, photos and a souvenir from our trip to Mexico. I went into the school office to sign in and waited to get my visitors pass. The school secretary called me in to explain that neither Rinda's Dad or I was on the approved access list. She explained that she was calling Rinda's Mother to get her permission to allow me to have lunch with Rinda.I remember thinking at the time, "well, the worse thing that could happen was that Rinda's Mother would say no". The secretary said that Rinda's Mother said "They haven't even bothered to see Rinda since 2001". I was shocked to learn that Rinda had kept our school lunch visits a secret from her mom for the past five years. The secretary said she was going to find Rinda. I waited and waited. Eventually she came back & said that she was unable to locate Rinda at the moment and to call back to the school at 1pm. </div><div> </div><div> </div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div> When I called back the secretary told me that Rinda had declined my visit. My heart broke into a million pieces. She said she told Rinda that her mother said for her to go tell her that she'd been contacted and see IF she still wanted to see me or not. What a mess. I just wanted to have lunch with Rinda and it turned into a fiasco. Unintentionally I'd caused Rinda to be put in the middle again. Trying not to allow Rinda to be put in the middle was something Rinda's Dad and I had made so many sacrifices for her benefit. Why didn't Rinda's Mother just say yes or no instead of putting Rinda on the spot. I couldn't understand it, but back then I didn't understand the tactics of Parental Alienation. I'd seen Rinda at school just five months earlier and she was thrilled to see me. We talked, laughed and took lots of photos.</div><div> </div><div> </div><div></div><div> I drove back out of state. I emailed Rinda & asked for an explanation. She responded by saying she was "really, really sorry" but that's just the way it has to be. She continued to say that she was doing really great without her Dad & I. When I emailed her back, she lost her temper and got mean with me. She said that she didn't need us and she didn't want us in her life. She said IF her Dad & I really cared about her then we would just leave her alone and just live her life, which was like a drowning person saying "If you really care, you'll just let go of my hand and let me drown. It was like what a missing person answering their door when someone has a gun to their head and saying "nothings wrong....I'm just fine....go away!!!!"</div><div> </div><div> </div><div> </div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div> It was the first time EVER that Rinda said that she didn't want to see us. If there is a word stronger than devastated....that is what we were.</div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div> For the next few weeks I'd sit in front of the window in our spare room, re-reading her emails & watching the leaves fall from the giant oak tree that has stood next to our house for the past 100 years. I examined each of her words, one by one, looking for clues to explain how she could be so cold & cruel. I read all of her emails over and over as I watched those brown, dry, dead leaves fall one by one, day by day, week by week. </div><div> </div><div> </div><div> </div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div> Despite my normally upbeat personality and positive attitude, I slowly slipped into a state of depression. I sat in front of that window, crying quietly, with heavy warm tears streaming how my face. I watched those leaves fall day after day until the big oak stood bare of all leaves. Then I watched the wind blow the leaves around the yard thinking that Rinda would not be magically reconnected to us anymore than those leaves would magically reconnect themselves to the old oak. November turned into December and December turned into January 2007.</div><div> </div><div> </div><div> </div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div> In January 2007, My Mother died unexpectedly and suddenly my focus was FORCED to redirect to having to deal with the horrendous task left for me, as my mother's first born child and executor of her estate. </div><div><br />Grandma Betty absolutely adored Rinda. Previously they talked on the phone often and made their big plans for their next visit. Grandma Betty handmade clothes, knitted & crocheted for Rinda. They were "thicker than thieves" and it was very hard to tell which one of them was more enchanted with the other. Grandma Betty had been waiting for literally years for her only granddaughter's return to our family. In 46 years of being My Mother's daughter, the only true regret I had was the decision to share the content of Rinda's angry November emails with my mom. When I read them to her...she reacted as though I'd just slapped her in the face AND kicked her in the stomach at the same time. </div><div> </div><div> </div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div> I do believe that sharing that information shortened her life, that it caused her to lose all hope of the long awaited reunion with Rinda which gave her the single purpose to continue to hang on to life. Within two months, her badly broken heart stopped and she was gone from our lives forever.</div><div> </div><div> </div><div> </div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div> Before November 6, 2006, I had always so enjoyed the changing of the seasons....sunny autumn days and seeing the trees change colors.</div><div></div><div>Now....the sight of the falling leaves always makes me cry................... </div>Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-84765621339466492742009-11-04T13:32:00.000-06:002009-11-06T13:41:39.750-06:00"A Parent's Creed"IF A CHILD LIVES WITH CRITICISM, SHE LEARNS TO CONDEMN<br /><br />IF A CHILD LIVES WITH HOSTILITY, SHE LEARNS TO FIGHT<br /><br />IF A CHILD LIVES WITH RIDICULE, SHE LEARNS TO BE CRUEL<br /><br />IF A CHILD LIVES WITH SHAME, SHE LEARNS TO FEEL GUILTY<br /><br />IF A CHILD LIVES WITH CONFLICT, SHE LEARNS TO BE ANGRY<br /><br />IF A CHILD LIVES WITH HOPELESSNESS, SHE LEARNS TO QUIT<br /><br /><br /><br />IF A CHILD LIVES WITH TOLERANCE, SHE LEARNS TO BE KIND<br /><br />IF A CHILD LIVES WITH ENCOURAGEMENT, SHE LEARNS TO WIN<br /><br />IF A CHILD LIVES WITH PRAISE, SHE LEARNS TO APPRECIATE<br /><br />IF A CHILD LIVES WITH FAIRNESS, SHE LEARNS JUSTICE<br /><br />IF A CHILD LIVES WITH SECURITY, SHE LEARNS TO HAVE FAITH<br /><br />IF A CHILD LIVES WITH APPROVAL, SHE LEARNS TO LIKE HERSELF<br /><br /><br />IF A CHILD LIVES WITH ACCEPTANCE AND UNCONDITIONAL LOVE,<br />SHE LEARNS TO GIVE AND RECEIVE LOVE THROUGHOUT HER LIFETIME<br />AND SHE WILL TEACH OTHERS TO DO SO....<br /><br /><br />I found this on a wrinkled yellowed newpaper clipping in a box of my mom's papers. It must have been from the 1960's, although it was undated, on the back there was an advertisement for a tire shop selling 4 new tires, balanced, rotated and mounted for a total of $52, so it must have been a long time ago !<br />I changed the wording from "he learns" to "she learns".Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-59429796841574292082009-10-27T14:50:00.001-05:002009-10-27T14:53:19.739-05:00Rinda's Baby Blanket<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBDRpK1J5jo5Fxkqu0lwYf-0DhFRFixZWK31XpyRM2RaGS4PqJY4ShuJ3ORMNxSNmj3nzpPs3rk5OFpKyUPB_MhrXi-pbO41K6bTttbj_HGCbMLxvYuFlBt3n2CCnftg6FfpjYC0OkOPQ/s1600-h/DSCF0117%5B1%5D.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 300px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5397369757231269394" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBDRpK1J5jo5Fxkqu0lwYf-0DhFRFixZWK31XpyRM2RaGS4PqJY4ShuJ3ORMNxSNmj3nzpPs3rk5OFpKyUPB_MhrXi-pbO41K6bTttbj_HGCbMLxvYuFlBt3n2CCnftg6FfpjYC0OkOPQ/s400/DSCF0117%5B1%5D.jpg" /></a> I recently took Rinda's baby blanket out of the cedar chest. Can you believe Rinda's Dad has saved it for all these years. No telling how many times he's moved since then, but he's held on to this piece of his daughter's history.<br /><div></div>Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5080412233669732102.post-8810766146470792392009-10-16T14:47:00.003-05:002009-10-16T15:08:58.985-05:00Have I Lost My Mind ?I turned 49 years old the other day. Even though Rinda typically ignores my text messages I decided to text her. After all what did I have to lose, it was my birthday and maybe just maybe she would take that in consideration and actually say HELLO or HAPPY BIRTHDAY.<br /><br />I sent the following text to Rinda:<br /><strong><span style="color:#cc0000;">"Rinda...Today is my 49th birthday & my 9th birthday without you. Will you grant my wish and say something nice to me? Love you still & miss you always</span></strong><br /><br /><br />This was her response:<br /><strong><span style="color:#cc0000;">"No, because it's not true. How can I miss much less love someone who is trying to take me away from my mother, my home, my friends, my school, the place that I love and grew up in? </span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#cc0000;">Have you lost your damn mind?</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#cc0000;"></span></strong><br /><span style="color:#000000;">Feeling like I'd been kicked in the stomach, like most of her messages make me feel, I was determined to answer her back. So after a couple of minutes I sent her the following text:</span><br /><strong><span style="color:#cc0000;">"I haven't lost my mind yet but you have broken my heart AGAIN, but I forgive you. Someday you will learn the power of forgiveness (Maybe before it's too late?) Thank you for your kind words for my birthday. I know you have a good heart. </span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#cc0000;">I love you still"</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="color:#cc0000;"></span></strong><br /><span style="color:#000000;">I'll answer the very important question of "Have I Lost My Mind ? " in a future blog post. </span>Rindas 2 Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12077652068882587193noreply@blogger.com0