I'm not looking for a fight. Basically I'm a very peace loving person. My blog post yesterday titled "A Rose By Any Other Name" was a spontaneous response to reading some else's blog.
I proposed a challenge to those that do not believe parental alienation exist. My challenge stated "If you doubt that Parental Alienation exists, then send your child to live with your worst enemy, who will not allow you contact with your child and SEE if they are able to teach your child to hate you enough to disown you"
I'd like to clarify that I do not consider Rinda's Mother as our worst enemy, even though she has treated us that way. I have tried to contact her. In January 2008, I called, emailed and asked for the opportunity to speak with her. I was asking for HER PERMISSION to be able to contact Rinda while I was in the city. Needless to say, she refused to answer my phone calls and my emails went unanswered. Before leaving the city, as a last ditch effort, I went to Rinda's Mother's office in hope of speaking with her. I wanted her to know that I would do anything in my power to help her and that I am willing to assist in ANYTHING that would be beneficial to Rinda. I was willing to cooperate with anything if that would help the situation. As a matter of a fact, I was (am still am) willing to go on national television and get on my knees to beg her for mercy on Rinda's behalf. I wanted to tell her that Rinda's Dad and I are willing to START ALL OVER, ask for her forgiveness of all past issues for whatever percieved wrongs she believes us to be guilty of and that if being wrong would fix the problem that we would be willing to declare being the most wrong people in history.
While I went on a mission of mercy, I was not shown mercy. When I went to her office, she refused to see me. I left a note asking to be allowed to see Rinda even for 5 minutes. I left the city without making any progress.
We've never been looking for a fight....We have honored Rinda's Mother for the simple fact that she is and will always be Rinda's Mother. We NEVER spoke against Rinda's Mother in Rinda's presence. As a matter of fact, we defended Rinda's Mother and made excuses for her short-comings back when Rinda was a little girl. We always said, what will we tell Rinda, what will be our answer when she demands to know what happened to our family to make us end up in such a mess. The only answer, I could come up with was the reason we didn't tell her the truth, that her mother was using her as a weapon against us was: "You were just a little girl, who loved her mommy, daddy and 2nd mom and we loved you too much to tell you the cold hard facts of the ugly truth. I remember how distressed she would become, when she was aware that her mother disapproved of Rinda's Dad and I. She was only 7 years old and I'd tell her....Don't worry about adult stuff, because grown ups are silly, especially divorced grown ups with little kids.
When we learned of the term PARENTAL ALIENATION, it was like a light bulb went on over our heads. It was like having a disease for 6 years and finally getting the diagnosis which labeled our illness, which gave it a name....All the pieces fit....it sounded like we wrote the article ourselves, describing the illness and the symptoms to a tee. So whatever label they want to put on it, Parental Alienation or some other name.....but it is what it is.....When one parent actively teaches a child to reject their other parent solely based on their own anger and pain without consideration for the well being of their own child....call it what you want,but, it is WRONG ! ! ! !
As the saying goes....A Rose By Any Other Name....(is still a rose) would smell as sweet.
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