Rindas2mom: Rinda....Our Warrior Princess

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Rinda....Our Warrior Princess

Rinda, this is you....our warrior princess. The foto was taken during the summer of 2000. I edited it today....That's what I did today instead of texting you or emailing you today on the 50th day since your 18th birthday, Fifty days since you became an adult and actually do have the right to choose to not allow us to be a part of your world.....Fifty days doesn't sound like much to you, I know, but it is an eternity to us....counting the 3302 days of your childhood was stolen from us and from you. That adds up to 3352 days since you walked through the door of our home. And that my dear is a damn long time. That is half of your lifetime and one fifth of mine.

The original version of this foto is one of my all-time favorite photos of you. The jungle print cloth which Grandma Betty made your outfit from is perfect for this foto with it's many bright colors. One of the things I love about this foto is that you came up with the idea all on your own...you put the feathers in your hair and you made your spear all on your own with a quartz crystal rock that we got in Arkansas when we went camping on an island (remember we took our baby goat camping with us ?) One of the things I like about this foto is that you had to work sooo hard to look mean,fierce and angry like a warrior for this foto. In reality you were the sweetest,kindest,happiest, funniest eight year old girl on the planet. Being a warrior wasn't something in your future until your childhood got hijacked by parental alienation.

Over the past four years I've seen that you have "waged war" on many fronts. Now you are at war with yourself and many others. You've gone from being bullied to bullying others. Do the words "terroristic threatening" remind you of the hassles you've been involved in over the past few years. You were threatened so now you've learned to threaten others. I know your heart and you defend yourself sometimes to the extreme.I've seen you become an angry young woman who ends up in a hassle with different people in different places. Are you out looking for a fight? I've seen time after time you being involved in some fight or kind of an angry argument with other people including people your own age within your social circle. You've learned to defy other's authority to a point we worry about your safety. If I were given only five minutes to see you face to face, I would ask you "what will it take for you to be able to stop being a warrior and learn to live in peace with yourself, your friends and family as well as society in general???? " All the professionals haven't been able to answer this question "Why is Rinda so angry".....but I know the answer. I've always known the answer.....but my love you are going to have to ask yourself that question and answer it for yourself honestly before you will be able to overcome the issues that will continue to cause you problems in your future because those issues will affect you and the people you choose to share your life with. No matter what, we love you.....our little warrior princess !!!!

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A Summary of Events

1999-2001 Rinda, her dad & I had a very happy life together.We were very bonded as a family unit & enjoyed our time together. We lived, loved, laughed together. We had Spaghetti night on Wednesdays. We hung a photo of Rinda's mother in Rinda's bedroom. Rinda was an exceptional child. She was sweet, smart, funny and beautiful. She did not have a problem in the world. She was just a little girl that loved BOTH her mother and her father. She was a joy and blessing to our lives until Parental Alienation destroyed our relationship and destroyed her ability to love, trust and respect her Dad & I.

2001- 2010 Rinda's mother sent us official notice that she was relocating Rinda to the West Coast to live, which broke our hearts. We made the decison to move away solely based on that lie. Later, we discovered that her mother had moved her to a new school a few miles from her old school. We would have NEVER gave up our weekends with Rinda....NEVER...EVER. We began having "lunch visits" with Rinda every Thursday. Over the years we have had several lawyers, which were hired to "fix" the problem of being denied access to Rinda . When the judge ordered Access Facilitation to re-unite our family we were thrilled. When they refused to enforce the court order we were heart-broken again. Rinda was being told lies about us and about the situation BUT we never spoke against her mother, NEVER. We never spoke up to defend ourselves since we didn't want for Rinda to be put in the middle. Rinda was told to be afraid of us and that we would kidnap her and never let her see her mother again. She was told that we had abandoned her and moved away and had forgotten about her. She was also told that her dad NEVER paid child support, which was another lie. She was told that she didn't have dental insurance which was a lie also. During 4th, 5th and 6th grade, the only way we could see her was to have lunch at her school. The attorney said we shouldn't go back to her school until he got the situation worked out. I didn't see her face for all of 7th grade & by the last week 8th grade I decided to go against what the lawyer said. On 5-19-2006 I went to lunch during the last week of 8th grade. We took fotos, talked & laughed. She told me she loves me. She gave me her email address & we kept in touch for about 6 months, In Nov.2006, I went to have lunch with Rinda who was now in 9th grade. The school notified Rinda's mother & when they told Rinda her mother had been told of my visit, Rinda declined to see me....It was the first time ever that she EVER said she didn't want to see her Dad & I. That is when we learned that Rinda had kept our school lunch visits a secret from her mother since 2001. To this day, I have not seen Rinda's face since 5-19-2006. By 2007, Rinda began having problems at home and school. We have done everything in our power to help Rinda however, she and her mother have defied us at every turn. They have defied every court order and continue to do so.Her Dad has consulted with her school officials, her doctors and all the other professionals which had contact with Rinda & her problems. He had to push & push to get the school to file truancy after after she continually failed in school due to truancy. All the years we tried to get our visitation rights enforced, we were only asking the court to enforce the rights that we already had. On the advice of our most recent attorney we filed for full custody when Rinda was 16 years old. We were told that due to her poor attendance record, truancy, failure in school, legal problems as well as behavioral problems that we should be given the opportunity to intervene on Rinda's behalf, to get her back on the right track & hopefully salvage her high school career. Delay after delay, finally, a social study was ordered which proved EVERYTHING that we had been claiming for years to be TRUE. Rinda's life has been damaged due to PARENTAL ALIENATION, now, it is officially documented by the Family Court System for what ever that is worth. The social worker agrees that Rinda NEEDS to be reunited with her Dad, but....it's too late, since Family Court isn't set up to deal with situations such as ours. As a token, they ordered Rinda to attend counseling with her Dad, but she continues to defy that court order as well (she only attended 2 sessions) Now with her 18th birthday approaching, we have NO other (legal) recourse.....although no one will uphold the law and allow Rinda's Dad to exercise his rights as a father...he is being required to continue to pay child support which enables Rinda's downward spiral. After 4 yrs of high school Rinda will remain in 10th grade at the end of this school year, she should be graduating 6-8-2010. Her graduation date according to her school records is now 2012. In summary,"our" little girl was stolen from us, our heart have been held hostage since 2001, her childhood was hijacked and her life has been greatly damaged.

This is the bottom line......the system chewed us up and spit us out but the true victim of the system's failure is Rinda. Her life will never be the same. Our life will never be the same. What has been taken from her (and us) can never be replaced.

May God have mercy on our souls because no one else has shown us a single ounce of mercy. May God find a way to keep Rinda safe and somehow guide her life in a positive direction, because apparently it is now out of our hands !!!!

PARENTAL ALIENATION CASES SHOULD NOT BE IN FAMILY COURT THEY SHOULD BE DEALT WITH IN CRIMINAL COURT.