Rindas2mom: A Letter To Rinda From Rindas2mom

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

A Letter To Rinda From Rindas2mom

Rinda,

You emailed yesterday and asked me why your Dad filed for full custody and is going to court next Monday ? I could give you the long answer as I did in the 8 page, single spaced, typed letter that I wrote to you back in 2007, but instead I'll give you the short answer: BECAUSE HE LOVES YOU....and because he is still your Dad. And as your Dad, it is still his responsibility to guide your life in a positive direction

You keep reminding us that you'll be turning 17 years old in June. Yes, my love, we know your birthday all too well. It is 26 days, 13hours and 58 minutes from this moment. When you were taken from us in May 2001 (just a couple of weeks before your 9th birthday) until now has been TWO THOUSAND NINE HUNDRED AND 10 DAYS (2,910 days), 10 HOURS, 3 MINUTES AND 17 SECONDS. That my dear is a very long time.

By the way, for your 9th birthday, we had already gotten your Hamster Habitat, that you'd been wanting so badly. We still have it, stored away in the attic at the cabin. Thank goodness, that we didn't go ahead and buy the hamsters in advance or we'd have been taking care of them for all these years as we have had to do with your bunny rabbit. By the way,sorry to tell you but Wuzzy died a few years ago and we buried her in our pet cemetery here at our place.

Yes, my sweetie, we have recognized and honored your birthday year after year for the past eight birthdays. Some years, I'd bake your favorite Dark Chocolate Fudge Cake. But every one of those birthdays we commemorated your special day without you. And most likely, we will continue to be separated for this next birthday as well.

Seventeen.....it certainly does have a special ring to it doesn't it. What a beautiful young woman you've grown up to be. Even though as far as you are concerned, we aren't your parents and we have no value to you, still, we love you so much and no matter what, we will never give up on you ! ! ! !

1 comment:

Rindas 2 Mom said...: I thought that you should know that Rinda "normally" won't communicate with me or her Dad. It's been over 6 months since I've received a single word from her despite my weekly emails and text messages.

Everything in me, wants to respond to that email she sent. I want to tell her AGAIN, none of this is her fault and tell her that I know everything will work out. I totally understand how it must seem like the end of the world to her to think that she might have to come to live with her Dad and I. Despite all the things I have to say to her, I MUST wait and see what the attorney wishes us to do in regard to what information to share with her. SO, for now, I'll keep on blogging and holding my breath !; May 15, 2009 at 4:05 PM

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A Summary of Events

1999-2001 Rinda, her dad & I had a very happy life together.We were very bonded as a family unit & enjoyed our time together. We lived, loved, laughed together. We had Spaghetti night on Wednesdays. We hung a photo of Rinda's mother in Rinda's bedroom. Rinda was an exceptional child. She was sweet, smart, funny and beautiful. She did not have a problem in the world. She was just a little girl that loved BOTH her mother and her father. She was a joy and blessing to our lives until Parental Alienation destroyed our relationship and destroyed her ability to love, trust and respect her Dad & I.

2001- 2010 Rinda's mother sent us official notice that she was relocating Rinda to the West Coast to live, which broke our hearts. We made the decison to move away solely based on that lie. Later, we discovered that her mother had moved her to a new school a few miles from her old school. We would have NEVER gave up our weekends with Rinda....NEVER...EVER. We began having "lunch visits" with Rinda every Thursday. Over the years we have had several lawyers, which were hired to "fix" the problem of being denied access to Rinda . When the judge ordered Access Facilitation to re-unite our family we were thrilled. When they refused to enforce the court order we were heart-broken again. Rinda was being told lies about us and about the situation BUT we never spoke against her mother, NEVER. We never spoke up to defend ourselves since we didn't want for Rinda to be put in the middle. Rinda was told to be afraid of us and that we would kidnap her and never let her see her mother again. She was told that we had abandoned her and moved away and had forgotten about her. She was also told that her dad NEVER paid child support, which was another lie. She was told that she didn't have dental insurance which was a lie also. During 4th, 5th and 6th grade, the only way we could see her was to have lunch at her school. The attorney said we shouldn't go back to her school until he got the situation worked out. I didn't see her face for all of 7th grade & by the last week 8th grade I decided to go against what the lawyer said. On 5-19-2006 I went to lunch during the last week of 8th grade. We took fotos, talked & laughed. She told me she loves me. She gave me her email address & we kept in touch for about 6 months, In Nov.2006, I went to have lunch with Rinda who was now in 9th grade. The school notified Rinda's mother & when they told Rinda her mother had been told of my visit, Rinda declined to see me....It was the first time ever that she EVER said she didn't want to see her Dad & I. That is when we learned that Rinda had kept our school lunch visits a secret from her mother since 2001. To this day, I have not seen Rinda's face since 5-19-2006. By 2007, Rinda began having problems at home and school. We have done everything in our power to help Rinda however, she and her mother have defied us at every turn. They have defied every court order and continue to do so.Her Dad has consulted with her school officials, her doctors and all the other professionals which had contact with Rinda & her problems. He had to push & push to get the school to file truancy after after she continually failed in school due to truancy. All the years we tried to get our visitation rights enforced, we were only asking the court to enforce the rights that we already had. On the advice of our most recent attorney we filed for full custody when Rinda was 16 years old. We were told that due to her poor attendance record, truancy, failure in school, legal problems as well as behavioral problems that we should be given the opportunity to intervene on Rinda's behalf, to get her back on the right track & hopefully salvage her high school career. Delay after delay, finally, a social study was ordered which proved EVERYTHING that we had been claiming for years to be TRUE. Rinda's life has been damaged due to PARENTAL ALIENATION, now, it is officially documented by the Family Court System for what ever that is worth. The social worker agrees that Rinda NEEDS to be reunited with her Dad, but....it's too late, since Family Court isn't set up to deal with situations such as ours. As a token, they ordered Rinda to attend counseling with her Dad, but she continues to defy that court order as well (she only attended 2 sessions) Now with her 18th birthday approaching, we have NO other (legal) recourse.....although no one will uphold the law and allow Rinda's Dad to exercise his rights as a father...he is being required to continue to pay child support which enables Rinda's downward spiral. After 4 yrs of high school Rinda will remain in 10th grade at the end of this school year, she should be graduating 6-8-2010. Her graduation date according to her school records is now 2012. In summary,"our" little girl was stolen from us, our heart have been held hostage since 2001, her childhood was hijacked and her life has been greatly damaged.

This is the bottom line......the system chewed us up and spit us out but the true victim of the system's failure is Rinda. Her life will never be the same. Our life will never be the same. What has been taken from her (and us) can never be replaced.

May God have mercy on our souls because no one else has shown us a single ounce of mercy. May God find a way to keep Rinda safe and somehow guide her life in a positive direction, because apparently it is now out of our hands !!!!

PARENTAL ALIENATION CASES SHOULD NOT BE IN FAMILY COURT THEY SHOULD BE DEALT WITH IN CRIMINAL COURT.